Tag: macros

Ladies: Men All Over The World Want This

Posted by djskagnetti – February 21, 2013

And what is it we want?  WE WANT YOU TO STOP FUCKING POSTING GIRL MACROS.  You know the ones:  A picture that contains nothing but words.  No man would ever post this garbage.  If he does, he’s not a man.  That’s why they are to be hereby referred to from this day forth as girl macros.   If you want people to read what’s on your mind and know what you’re feeling, write it out yourself.  Are the people of the world becoming so lazy that they can’t even write out what they’re feeling anymore?  They have to post a picture of some shitty quote, or a cunty jab at men, or something that proves they are so different from all the rest or maybe even a little bit fucked in the head so they’re a lot of fun and cool (fucked in the head doesn’t translate to fun and cool, no man knows why women think that we want that), or it’s full of remorseful sad feels?  Know that every man that sees that shit rolls their eyes as hard as they fucking can.  Arnold Schwarzenegger put it best:  “STOP IT!”

Examples of the shit we hate:

/rant

Introducing: RTS, SPOOS!

Posted by djskagnetti – January 27, 2013

It means:

Reach Through Screen,

Strangle Person On Other Side!

Which precisely sums up what I wish I could do when somebody posts this lowest common denominator garbage:

never ignore a person

which are bad enough to begin with, but, by the looks of it, now the fucking illiterate are trying their hand at these cocksuckers.  RTS, SPOOS!

Girl Macros

Posted by djskagnetti – June 8, 2012

Pretty much sums it up.

P.S. Either go all small i’s for i or i’m to appeal to netnerds or go all capital I’s to appeal to people who know how to write. The combo just makes me think the person who made this is a textard who doesn’t know proper English and slapped this hallmark bullshit together with a melancholytron-filtered stock photo in 5 seconds. Why not throw some 4s in there for “for” while you’re at it. Have fun making babies and living off the government the rest of your life.

ecards

Posted by djskagnetti – June 8, 2012

I used to think these were kind of funny.  Like 6 fucking months ago.  They were witty at times (6 months ago), off-the-wall, come-at-you-from-nowhere at other times (6 months ago.)  Some were a little bit offensive (6 months ago), some used just the right amount of swearing (6 months ago.)  And I like the style of art the pictures use – solid color with old-timey looking vector art.  But lately it seems that every single person on facebook, especially (quote on quote) humor groups have figured out that these are a (quote on quote) good solution when they run out of actual funny stuff.  Which, it seems, they run out of actual funny stuff a lot.  “Hrm, can’t scour google images or macro sites hard enough to find anything good, so I’ll just post another ecard so people still think I’m funny.”  Look, it’s simple:  if you’re going to make a humor group on facebook (or anywhere), make sure you have the following things accounted for:

1)  You’re funny enough to make your own funny shit.

2)  You’re good enough with the interwebz to know how to look for funny things, ie, things that are actually funny.

3)  Make sure you add other people who are funny to pick up the slack, or all the slack if you’re not funny.  But if you’re not funny, then you shouldn’t have made a “humor group”, now should you?

4)  Delete your fucking ecard fap folder for fucks sake.  Last thing people want is to be bombarded by another 10-20 ecard posts a day.

Thanks.

/rant