I don’t know what’s more annoying, when big box companies don’t pay their employees enough, or when assholes with blogs pop up windows all over the place before, during and after the video, have little side bars that follow your scrolling, and just write 2 lines of text to go along with their video to cash in on the story (with views and whatever else) instead of actually working hard at creating something decent and informative. If you want people to like your bullshit so badly at least try a little bit, you lazy piece of shit Brandon Weber. I guarantee you’ll never find any of that shit here. /rant
And what is it we want? WE WANT YOU TO STOP FUCKING POSTING GIRL MACROS. You know the ones: A picture that contains nothing but words. No man would ever post this garbage. If he does, he’s not a man. That’s why they are to be hereby referred to from this day forth as girl macros. If you want people to read what’s on your mind and know what you’re feeling, write it out yourself. Are the people of the world becoming so lazy that they can’t even write out what they’re feeling anymore? They have to post a picture of some shitty quote, or a cunty jab at men, or something that proves they are so different from all the rest or maybe even a little bit fucked in the head so they’re a lot of fun and cool (fucked in the head doesn’t translate to fun and cool, no man knows why women think that we want that), or it’s full of remorseful sad feels? Know that every man that sees that shit rolls their eyes as hard as they fucking can. Arnold Schwarzenegger put it best: “STOP IT!”
Examples of the shit we hate:
If these people:
1) are serious then they are fucking pathetic
2) are not serious, they are either:
a) fucking pathetic
b) wasting people’s time. fucking assholes.
c) going to sell their page with 1 million likes to a band, artist, politician or some other group who are too lazy to generate their own fanbase. fucking assholes.
Join my facebook group http://www.facebook.com/Anti1MillionLikes dedicated to despising this bullshit. This is a trend that needs to end now.
This year, why not make a really good New Year’s Resolution for once in your life? Make an oath to yourself, and to the internet, that you will stop posting these bullshit hallmark happy-go-lucky sugar-coated lowest-common-denominator make-everyone-happy waste-of-time fucking cocksucker macros on facebook or anywhere else! If you are the type of person who has to define themselves by retarded quotes then you are exactly the type of person who is nothing like those quotes. Why not make up your own quotes, why not make up your own definition of yourself? Nobody wants to read this shit, nobody cares, nobody thinks it’s sweet or cute or funny or amazing or a life-changer, it’s not going to make a difference in anyone’s day except waste 10-30 seconds of their life, 10-30 seconds that they’ll never get back! YOU ARE ACTUALLY DOING MORE HARM THAN GOOD! What does it take for you motherfuckers to understand? So, please, FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS HOLY, have a macro intervention for a loved one, somebody who you know is making these, or even an intervention for yourself if you can’t stop posting these. MAKE A NEW YEAR’S RESOLUTION THAT WILL HELP EVERYONE!
This photo has been making the rounds on facebook
Pretty much every statement that people post over and over again, such as
I agree with.
Just out of curiosity, I decided to see if the website is real. Oh man, is it ever. And I have never seen a more hate-fueled apparatus in my life!
Here is a clip from their page
Notice those numbers? That prompted me to create this
If your god hates “fags”, kills that many people, sent that many people to hell since I loaded the page, spilled that much oil into the gulf, and cares that many nanoseconds about us as you WBC fuckers do, then I want no part of your religion or your god. Fuck you and your god is a better way to put it.
I used to think these were kind of funny. Like 6 fucking months ago. They were witty at times (6 months ago), off-the-wall, come-at-you-from-nowhere at other times (6 months ago.) Some were a little bit offensive (6 months ago), some used just the right amount of swearing (6 months ago.) And I like the style of art the pictures use – solid color with old-timey looking vector art. But lately it seems that every single person on facebook, especially (quote on quote) humor groups have figured out that these are a (quote on quote) good solution when they run out of actual funny stuff. Which, it seems, they run out of actual funny stuff a lot. “Hrm, can’t scour google images or macro sites hard enough to find anything good, so I’ll just post another ecard so people still think I’m funny.” Look, it’s simple: if you’re going to make a humor group on facebook (or anywhere), make sure you have the following things accounted for:
1) You’re funny enough to make your own funny shit.
2) You’re good enough with the interwebz to know how to look for funny things, ie, things that are actually funny.
3) Make sure you add other people who are funny to pick up the slack, or all the slack if you’re not funny. But if you’re not funny, then you shouldn’t have made a “humor group”, now should you?
4) Delete your fucking ecard fap folder for fucks sake. Last thing people want is to be bombarded by another 10-20 ecard posts a day.
RIGHT ON SISTA! Gawd I hate this recycled, dumb-down, lowest-common-denominator, get-everyone-on-the-bandwagon-
On monday this guy comes in and says he’s my boss’s son and he’s there to work. I don’t believe him for a second because I know my boss’s son and he’s 8. So I call my boss and he tells me just to let him work the register. Then the next day he comes back with my boss and my boss tells me that this guy is going to take over managing the place because he had to go back to Jordan. “But don’t worry, nothing will change.” I ask why he was going and he said his mom was sick. The next day I ask my boss how long he’s going to be gone, and he tells me hopefully not long. But then he says, “Even when I do come back the guy will still be managing because I need to focus all my attention at the store on the north side.” So the new manager comes in today and tells me he knows I’ve been here the longest so he’s giving me the weekends off, but then shows me the schedule for next week and it’s all closing shifts 5pm to midnight. Monday through thursday. I’m like wtf?! and he says he’s the manager and he needs to work the mornings because he goes to school at night. His job was to keep costs down and so he was going to work 7 days a week open to 4 and get paid salary. Only he was going to deal with paperwork, write checks, and everything that I have done for the last 3 years. He tried to make it out like he was taking the brunt of the blow by saying he wasn’t going to get overtime or anything and he had to be there 7 days a week. He said if I had a problem to call my boss and talk to him. I tried calling twice from my phone and once from the store phone, but it went to voicemail each time. The new manager then gave me his phone number and said that my boss wanted us to all call him from now on. So I just got fucked. I at least asked him to give me fridays too and he agreed, which is nice, but it’s still cutting like 20 hours off my check, which is a really hard fucking blow. I’ve worked there almost 6 years, doing the mornings for 3 years, doing everything that guy says he’s going to be doing now and I never got paid salary. If I even asked for a raise my boss said I could find another job if I wanted more money. I even texted my boss, saying, “You said nothing was going to change and now I’m working 5-close monday through friday, what’s the deal?” and he never even texted back. The same thing happened over at the other Loon. The lady Lorena, who worked for my boss 10 years, got pushed out because the new manager wanted to work mornings. She finally got fired over some bullshit along with everybody else who worked there for years. I bet my boss told them all over there that nothing was going to change there, either. How long before this happens to my store? Even if it doesn’t, before I was doing ok on money – I had to work 45 hours a week, but I was at least ok financially – but now I don’t even know if I can make ends meet. And I gotta work nights now? This is fucking terrible. “Hey, thanks for working for me for 6 years, oh by the way, FUCK YOU.”